Wonderings of an Aimless Mind

I'm just looking for a way to post... Is that too much too ask?
Lately, I've been neglecting this space and that is way unfair.
Hopefully this works. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

--
"Love is a hidden fire, A pleasant sore, A delicious poison, A
delectable pain, An agreeable torment, A sweet and throbbing wound, A
gentle death."

Scorpio is typically described in one word: intense. Deeply emotional and emotionally complex, Scorpio possesses an incredible charisma that attracts and stimulates others, who always want to know, Who is that behind the intriguing mystery? That's the great question: Who lives behind the sexy, alluring yet impregnable persona Scorpio portrays? The answer isn't an easy one to find. Most Scorpios like to keep their secrets, and perhaps they couldn't tell you even if they wanted to; their constantly rising and falling emotional responses often prove confusing at best. Their driving pursuit, however, is connection. It's what gives them their reputation for being amazing lovers and what makes them so intense in both romantic and platonic relationships. Behind that drive to connect, however, is a driving sense of insecurity. Scorpio is afraid that if it disconnects from others, the disconnection will be complete and irrevocable. This is the reason why Scorpio has developed such an elaborate system of maintaining engagement, complete with secrets and allusions, manipulations and occasional rages and that Scorpion's sting that can lash out whenever Scorpio gets its feelings hurt.

All this takes up a lot of time and energy, to say the least. Scorpio's Karmic task is to learn to relax and let go of its fear of abandonment and being alone. If Scorpio can learn that to disconnect isn't necessarily permanent, there would be less of a need for manipulative or vindictive behavior; of course, the only way to learn that lesson is to let go, which may be far easier said than done. Scorpio tends to be one of the most possessive, jealous and suspicious Signs of the Zodiac. Those born under its influence possess a heightened sense of secrets and are always trying to sniff out what's hidden. However, other Signs may be more forthright and direct, meaning everything is out in the open but Scorpios will try to find out the "real" truth anyway, perhaps even to the point of creating a secret or a lie where there isn't one. Scorpios must learn the value of trust and privacy. Allow friends and lovers to feel trusted and trustworthy; allow them to choose which parts of themselves to share and which to keep private.

One reason it may be hard to trust others is that we are afraid we can't trust ourselves to withstand being hurt or taken advantage of. When something like that happens to Scorpio, its Scorpionic instinct is to get revenge. Scorpio is not a malicious Sign, mind you; it simply has an incredibly complex emotional life and tends to be at the mercy of those emotions. Scorpio must learn to self-regulate more effectively, to resist the urge to lash out when hurt, to rise above pettiness and manipulation. Learn to forgive and forget, since holding on to anger and grudges improves nothing for anyone.

These lessons are difficult to learn, however. In our struggles toward personal freedom, it helps to get inspiration from others who have already mastered what we are trying to learn. Aquarius possesses the emotional self-sufficiency and calm demeanor that Scorpio may lack; it would be unhealthy to try to stifle emotions, but it is important to be able to control one's actions in response. Taurus, Scorpio's Opposite Sign in the Zodiac, can teach Scorpio about honesty and directness; Leo can teach Scorpio to be warm and openhearted toward loved ones, rather than suspicious or demanding.

Side comment:
While reading through all this stuff (horoscopes and compatibility based on your zodiac sign), I realized that even the stars are "against" our so-called relationship. At syempre ngayon ko lang nalaman!

Since I'm stuck here with nothing else to do (I stopped my research for the biz as of the moment 'coz it's giving me a headache - well, what do I expect? Research always have that effect in me!) I decided to update this spot... Since I currently do not have the luxury of editing my blog constantly, I'm gonna take this opportunity to do so... Yup, I found a way to do this stuff here, hehehe!

Anyways, as mentioned earlier I'm trying to do some research for Okasyon etal. - yah know, wedding ideas and stuff (suppliers list, nice ideas from previous weddings and new themes for future weddings). Dunno why I'm suddenly so hyper about this stuff... responding to emails from our ygroups and actively looking for new sites on the web. So here goes some updates regarding our biz:

currently waiting for DENR's approval for our proposal regarding the Environmental Conference (in the meantime, we're trying to finish all the paperworks this week in preparation for the conference - I'm keeping my fingers crossed on this!).
also waiting for the schedule of cdt. shane so we could give her the proposal regarding the Scribe launch (hopefully, I could fit this in - I'm always rushing to work 'coz of the new location of PS). Haaay, I'm also wishing na sana she would see the wisdom of getting someone to organize the event. But then again, how could I manage this? Sa Baguio pa naman ang venue... don't wanna go there pa naman (too soon pa eh).
I need to finish all my assignments for the conference thingee. Ang lakas kasi ng loob ko na mag-promise na I'm gonna submit these documents by thursday (okay, goodluck sa akin kasi 2 days to go na lang po yun).
We also need to brainstorm about the proposal we're gonna make for the ring hop/grad ball of the graduating class (2006) of PMA. Waaah, ano ba kasalanan ko at parang mas lalong pinapa-alala ang past ko? Well, I'll just remind myself that this is just a job... no personal feelings or thoughts allowed!
There's also the wedding of a Kaakibat (yeah I know, no need to rub it in!). The good news is I'm not really going to be a part of this... Why? I'm with the events group of our marketing team, which means that I'm not "in-charge" of this gig 'coz there's a group for these kind events... Close call though.
We also have a new logo for our biz...

Real nice... right? Galing-galing kasi nila Case and Raine eh!!! Yipee, another stuff off or "worry list".
We need to decide on our "uniform". Gosh, it's so damn hard to pick a style we would all be comfortable with... Well, what would you expect from 8 gals with different personalities and body types?

Enough with our biz... Just thinking about the decisions we need to make and the tasks we need accomplish makes my head hurt na talaga! Know what though, I'm excited nonetheless! We're at least going somewhere with this venture... So unlike our first meetings where we actually accomplish nothing... We can do it girls! Konting sipag at tiyaga lang and we're gonna get there.

By the way, I have another blog... but I'm not going to make it public. Needed space for some of my secrets. I don't want to burden other's with some of my baggage and I don't want this blog to be all about my "so-called" issues in life. So why am I even writting it here, wala lang. Naaliw kasi ako eh. I like the design of that one kasi eh.