Wonderings of an Aimless Mind

Things are definitely not going my way... Just so you know, I've already reached my breaking point. The only question is, how do you breakdown and fall apart? Close friends know that I suck when it comes to the part where I would need to show what my true feelings are. Am not good in asking for help and letting go of my control over my emotions. That's the reason why most people think I'm always okay and happy... I wish!

A lot of things are happening around me and inside my head and I can't keep up! The sad part is, I just wanna give up and to hell with everything else! Don't know what I need to do first, the tasks that other people expects me to do or do I selfishly put those aside and just think of what I wanted to do first? To top it all off... not only am I sick in the head, I'm also physically sick, DAMN IT!!! I actually forgot that I do not have any special powers to ward off sickness. The 2 days PTO I filed did not help one bit. I must stop smoking and start taking my vitamins. I think I also need to go back to a healthy diet... you know, eat right and on time. I might loose weight but I also need the energy to do all the things I need to do on time.

'Yoko na talaga!!! Give up na me... Bakit kasi ang hirap mong kalimutan? Haaay, eto na naman ako. Para na akong sirang plaka nito eh. Akala ko okay na ako... hindi pa pala. All it took was that plane to crash and boom my hard-earned control went berseck! I know that I don't have any connection to that class anymore but --- ah ewan!!! But you know what, crying that night was the best thing that happened to me the past week or so. At least I was able to release all my pent-up emotions.

Ano nga ba talaga ang ginawa ko last week at nagkasakit na lang ako bigla?

*Overnight at Case's house - finished the letters needed for the events we are trying to organize.
*Ocular inspection of hotels in the manila area.
*Meeting for Okasyon etal.
*Ocular inspection of hotels in the makati area.
*Went to the wake in Fort Boni - not my idea, just doing Lynn a favor.
*Slept for 15 hours straight - yehey!!!
*Okasyon etal. board meeting - hay naku, dami ko na namang assignments.
*Went to work sick!

Hmmm, parang ang konti lang pala ng ginawa ko, pero super stressful. I guess, I got sick because of the weather na din. Mainit (sobra), tapos uulan (at syempre mababasa ako kasi wala akong payong, my fault!). Oh well, I hope I have one whole day to just rest and think of nothing. And God willing, when I do get to sleep I get to experience a dreamless sleep (meron bang ganito?).


Yuck, corny and boring ng post na ito! Can't organize my thoughts just yet. Actually, I just wanted to whine about ****** but I realized na sobra na talaga. I need to get a life!

***Note to self: Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him! Forget about him!